Thursday, March 26, 2026
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Scientists: Best way to curb youth drug abuse is make all prescriptions suppositories

WILMINGTON- Working hard to address a rise in teen addiction and abuse of prescription drugs, scientists believe they have finally come up with an answer to curbing this trend....

Dancing pig nothing more than publicity stunt, says talking horse

In a stunning exposé that's shaking the barnyard, a talking horse has stepped forward to declare that the...

Childless man psychotically listens to Disney music on way to work

In an utterly bizarre turn of events, a childless man has been spotted embarking on his daily commute...

Bitcoin enthusiast also unable to explain where babies come from

In a remarkable display of perplexity, a die-hard Bitcoin enthusiast has not only struggled to explain the mystique...

Child finds love for father when stumblingly upon trove of “Yo momma’s so fat” jokes

In an unforeseen turn of events, a young child's relationship with their father has taken a heartwarming twist....

Woman launches t-shirt shop with inspiring quotes; elsewhere, cricket chirps

Hold onto your indifference, folks, because Sarah Smith, self-proclaimed visionary and t-shirt enthusiast, has just unleashed a line of tees adorned with what she...

Man frustrated that only part of Matrix not coming true are the hot women in leather

In a curious twist of yearning, a group of passionate fans of "The Matrix" film series has voiced their collective frustration. These enthusiasts, primarily...

Geriatric senators use butterscotch candy to lure younger politicians

In a bid to infuse new blood into the political landscape, a group of senior senators, known colloquially as the "Geriatric Senators," has unveiled...

Cardiologist scratches head as primary care doctors warn exercise could lead to sprained ankles

In a bewildering twist of medical wisdom, cardiologists worldwide are left scratching their heads as primary care physicians sound the alarm: exercise might just...

Leaves fall, panic spreads that sky may be next

SARATOGA SPRINGS- It’s an autumn ritual, but the shedding of leaves this year is causing some people to fear. It appears a growing cohort...

Stock rally forces Gen Xer to get creative with plan to squander inheritance

CANTON, OH- Sally Fernandez always knew that her aging parents nest egg would become her inheritance when they passed along. What she didn’t realize...